Climbing on top of the pile of straw

When one straw falls on you, it is no big deal, but what about when the next one falls, and the next, and the next? Eventually, you can find yourself buried under a pile of straw. One piece is lightweight and small - no big deal, but if you don't brush off and essentially conquer that one piece as it falls, you have the possibility of being buried under it all. Once your are under the pile rather than on top of it, getting back on top can feel like such an insurmountable task. I know. I feel it all too often.

Thankfully, in this great big blog world, encouragement and helpful tools can be found. One blog-buddy has encouraged me and given me helpful tips and ideas, and kept me entertained as well with her own stories of KCF - otherwise known as Kitchen Combat Fatigue. Problem number one - I D.E.F.I.N.I.T.E.L.Y. had KCF. No doubt about it. I firmly believe that you don't have to be an expecting mom to get it. Not even a homeschooling mom. Hey, you probably don't even need to be a mom, or even a homemaker, or married to get Kitchen Combat Fatigue. I imagine that ANYONE that actually COOKS in their kitchen can easily get it. But enough about the requirements. I was worn out, frustrated and downright discouraged in my kitchen. I am not naive enough to think that as soon as our kitchen remodel project is finished, those frustrating feelings will magically disappear. I needed to reevaluate and reassess the goings-on in my kitchen.

Problem number two: I have such a hard time with jobs that you do once (yes, this is an issue in the kitchen as well, but for this part, we are covering the rest of the house), and then no later than the end of the day, you have to do the same job over! Solution one? Buy disposable clothes, and locate a self cleaning bathroom and a robot vacuum cleaner. Back to the real world, though. I am a person of FANTASTIC intentions and plans. Oh yes. I can make a list for anything, make a schedule and hang up a chart for anything, but if I am not remaining on TOP of the little pieces of straw, those lists, schedules and charts do me no good at all. I also have a very difficult time thinking OUTSIDE the box. I think that is why my schedules and plans and charts ALWAYS look the same and ALWAYS end up failing me. Or maybe I am failing them. I am great at the start, but then I falter. Hmm... What is that verse about running the race with perseverance? Yeah...

Spring cleaning "season" has helped me dig out from under the pile, but the last thing I want is Fall to roll around (or worse yet, next Spring) and some of those jobs that are done rarely are back on the list of things that REALLY need to get done, but I am frustrated because they R.E.A.L.L.Y. needed to get done a long time ago. I'd rather just stay consistent with all of it, but is cleaning my ENTIRE living room from the ceiling to the floor and EVERYTHING in-between every Monday really feasible? Not if I intend to cook, do dishes and laundry, and attend to school needs that day as well, it isn't. And I KNOW this, but really, I would LOVE to have my living room - and the dining room - be cleaned that way every single Monday. Then the bathroom on Tuesday, the kitchen on Wednesdays, bedrooms on Thursdays and the bathroom again on Friday. That isn't too much to require of myself, is it? Maybe not if it was a quick dust job, run the vacuum, and make sure everything is straightened, but, I tend to be an all or nothing person. We are either going 100mph or standing still - which is also something I need to work on - slow and steady wins that race. Because I can't keep up that schedule on my terms, I started looking around for not only encouragement because I was honestly feeling like such a failure as a wife and mom, but I needed ideas on how to fix it as well. One day I was visiting Sarah's page and came across her post on how she keeps a clean house. I followed the link she provided and went ahead and grabbed my very own Motivated Moms schedule. (See, I told you I'm a sucker for schedules.) Why did I grab yet ANOTHER schedule? Thinking Outside The Box, people out of the box. See, I can Spring Clean and organize and perfect like nobody's business, but keeping it all together and not getting discouraged or worn out with the day to day maintaining is where I lose it. This new perspective was part of what I needed. (You mean to tell me I don't have to clean the entire room that day? Really??)

The last problem? I'll admit it. Lack of sunshine. This girl desperately needs the sun, and by the time winter is winding down, a few good days of sunny, warm brightness do wonders for my winter blues funk.

So, here I am, on top of my pile of straw. I will continue to put one foot in front of the other, and with the help of The Son, I will "throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let (me) run with perseverance the race marked out for (me)." ~ Hebrews 12:1

Stalling and Gaining (Weeks four, five and six)

Oh. Lord. Ack. Dear Father in Heaven, HELP. Amen. Let's just say the last three weeks have not exactly been... productive... in the weight LOSS department. If I was her, I'd get excited... She should now be ahead in the pound-for-pound challenge. By how much? Well, week four, I was at a stand still. Same with week five. Six, on the other hand.... Yeah...... Up 4.2 pounds. Grrrrrreeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaat. I'd love to say it is because we went out on a date. I'd love to attribute it to pizza. Or being tired. Or a multitude of other things. But I need to be real. Yes, those things happened, but I can't make excuses. Those things are just life. I need to be able to follow through even when "life" happens. Otherwise it will just be a yo-yo forever. So, back to square one. Twelve pounds to go. What do you think, E? Can you gain 12 in the next seven months? Ready, set, GO!

Progress Report (Weeks two and three)

Just in case any of you noticed that I didn't post anything on this last week, take heart: I did not quit. :) Last week I was pretty much in hiding due to being sick and very worn down. Posting anything just was not on my list of things to do. I also ended up moving the "official weigh in day" from Mondays to Wednesdays. I've noticed weekends are not so great, and when I first started counting points, I actually started on a Wednesday, and it went SO. MUCH. BETTER. Monday and Tuesday allow me to recoup from the weekend.

Last Wednesday I weighed in 2.6 pounds down. Yay! For the most part I drank my water, although, I'll admit, with a very sore throat, the thought of drinking anything wasn't a pleasant one. Most of my water intake was probably in the form of Theraflu. *shudder* Exercise? Hahahahahahahahaha- oh. Extending the week by two days actually allowed me to get four workouts in. Also not bad considering.

This week I am down 1.6 pounds. I'm noticing a pattern here: Week one was 3.6, week two, 2.6. week three, 1.6. Time to break the cycle. A 0.6 pound weight loss for next week just WILL NOT be acceptable. :) As far as inches lost, I have no idea what last week was, but since the last check in with you guys, I've lost a total of two and a quarter inches. Slow and steady, wins the race, right?

How would I rate the success of this week(s)? Gotta admit, I'm sticking with that 5. I'm still not mastering exercising five times a week, and I definitely need to! I also need to get back on track with drinking two FULL Nalgenes a day. I did find some great songs for my iPod, though, and good tunes are a must! Last night while I was sweating my over-sized little hiney off, I was transported away to memories of being a love-struck teenager holed up in my room... What was playing on the iPod?  The Best of Rock Ballads.  Absolutely classic.  Not exactly get-your-blood-pumping-workout-music, but great tunes, nonetheless.  What amused me more was talking to Batman and discovering that I knew more of the songs than he did!  How did that happen?!?!  I'm certain that all of those songs were more from when he was a teen than when I was.... Hmm....

At the End of Week One

It has been one week since I started counting points officially enough to share it with you guys again, and progress has been made. Not as much as I was hoping for, but it is still a good start. I will admit that I slipped.... That's right, I hopped on the scale before this morning. *sigh* What can I say, maybe I'm a scale-aholic.... Because I checked before the "official weigh in," I know that I one point (Friday) I was down five pounds. Yup, F.I.V.E. Needless to say, after this weekend, I was NOT down five. My official count is down 3.6 pounds and 1 3/4 inches. Eh. I'll take it.

I was somewhat disappointed in the amount of workouts I was able to get in, but, with the way the week went, three might not be so bad. My goal is to get five in, though. Hubby fixed the Bowflex last night, so I don't need to wait on that, and the elliptical is, of course, always available. I'd like to do three on one, two on the other. I think persistence will be key there. On an up note, I did VERY well drinking water this week! Aside from Saturday, I think I consistently went through two to two-and-a-half Nalgene's a day. EXCELLENT for me!! (Normally I drink ONE glass a day... if that. Not much of a drinker... working on changing that.) Towards the end of the week, I found my body actually craving the water. Yahoo!!

One thing I definitely will be mindful of from now on is to make sure that we do not eat or snack right before bed. Aside from obliterating my points on Saturday (road trip food will do it every time!) we ate right before we went to bed Friday, Saturday and Sunday, and I noticed huge issues there. (Almost two pounds worth... Ack.)

The handy dandy points tracker has a spot at the end where you record your weigh in, and asks "on a scale of one to ten, how would you score your success this week?" I'll give it a five.

Well, it's that time of year again....

... You know the time... Resolutions, a time to make changes, a purging, if you will. Out with the old and in with the new. There is a bit of that going on in our household as well. Not so much "resolutions," but definitely changes being made and, I'd like to think, some purging. BUT, there will be more on that later.

Today isn't really about "in with the new," but rather a reinstating of something old. Yep, after a six month stint on birth control (gotta love those automatic ten pounds) and the holiday EATING season, I am staring an extra 15 pounds full in the face. And belly. And hips. Oh yeah, and thighs. Sigh. Stupid scale.



Time to count points again. And this guy has the right idea. At least part of it.




Last time I was counting points, using a smaller plate was actually one of the tricks I utilized. Portion control is significantly easier if your plate doesn't look empty. Batman is forever telling me to stop feeding him so much in his lunch. It's mental. I feel like I need to fill his containers. Just like most people need to fill their plate. His solution? He got me smaller containers for Christmas. :) (Ah, but that is part of that other post...) So, today I start over. Smaller plates, check.



Points counter, check. Measuring tape, check. Handy dandy points tracker that the sil/bf sent me last time I was counting, check.



A resolution? Hmm... Perhaps I should resolve to stay off the scale until next Monday morning. So far, so good. Yes, I am fully aware that it has only been an hour. Yes, I think I can do it.

Ta ta for now. I am off to see if I've lost anything by being good for breakf...... Oh. Shoot. Avoiding the scale may be harder than I thought.

♪♫ Making a List, and Checking Things Off ♫♪

Remember that list of things to do? The one that came with the reminder to enjoy the relationships and Reason rather than get bogged down in the project? Well.... I'm here to tell you, I am making PROGRESS!! Hip, hip, HURRAY!! Look what I've accomplished so far:

♦ Cookies:

◊ Grandma’s press cookies
◊ Chocolate peppermint cookies
◊ Peanut butter blossoms (We ate all the ones that mom sent home on Friday. Yes, we’re lushes sometimes. Yes, they were very tasty.)

◊ Saltine Cracker Toffee Bars (definitely on the permanent list!!)
◊ ANOTHER batch of Mrs. O’s sugar cookies. VERY important

◊ Decorate sugar cookies

◊ Ice the molasses cookies that are already done

♦ Make cookie trays from said cookies + the cookies that we already did on Friday (the ones that actually lasted the weekend around here…)

♦ Thaw out the cookies that we made Friday – that should probably be done first…..
♦ Deliver said cookie trays to K&K, Carquest, H-city fire department (for all their help – technically it’s from us, but it is F-town Fire Department’s “thank you”)
♦ Christmas cards
♦ Pick up and wrap remaining presents from mom’s house
♦ Put together gifts for Batman’s family
♦ Learn go over song to do with the brothers for the Christmas program on Sunday
♦ Get ahold of the brother with the idea to find out what song it is – again. (Ahem, Z, if you’re reading… I, uh, needtoberemindedofwhatsongwearedoing. I am pretty sure that text message has been erased. Oops.)

Oh, you wanted a visual?

The Reason

There is less than two weeks left until Christmas, and I look at my list of things that I still need to get done and sigh.

♦ Cookies:

◊ Grandma’s press cookies
◊ Chocolate peppermint cookies
◊ Peanut butter blossoms (We ate all the ones that mom sent home on Friday. Yes, we’re lushes sometimes. Yes, they were very tasty.)
◊ ANOTHER batch of Mrs. O’s sugar cookies. VERY important

♦ Make cookie trays from said cookies + the cookies that we already did on Friday (the ones that actually lasted the weekend around here…)
♦ Deliver said cookie trays to K&K, Carquest, H-city fire department (for all their help – technically it’s from us, but it is F-town Fire Department’s “thank you”)
♦ Christmas cards
♦ Pick up and wrap remaining presents from mom’s house
♦ Put together gifts for Batman’s family
♦ Learn song to do with the brothers for the Christmas program on Sunday
♦ Get ahold of the brother with the idea to find out what song it is – again. (Ahem, Z, if you’re reading… I, uh, needtoberemindedofwhatsongwearedoing. I am pretty sure that text message has been erased. Oops.)

Then I take a breath and remember something that Aunt Pat posted on Rachel's page the other day: (in a nutshell) It isn't about the project, it is about the relationship.

It isn't about all of those things that I "need" to get done. It is about the relationships that I build in the meantime. And most of all, it is about our Savior. Not the cookies, not the presents, not even the snow. This is a time to reflect on Him, and thank Him for the ultimate gift: His Son, and therefore, Life.

What is it?

There has been a devotional sitting on the end table for a couple months now (thanks, M), silently beckoning me into a deeper study and pursuit. I have put it off, with varying excuses ranging from, "I'm too tired today. I'll start tomorrow," (and we all "tomorrow" never comes) to "I don't think I have it in me right now." Today I picked up the devotional and set aside my worries, fears, and short-comings. Why? The devotional is "The Pursuit of Holiness" and frankly, holiness is something that I have struggled with forever, it seems. I know that God calls us to holiness, but it often seems so unattainable. And in this quest to be holy, will I acquire a "holier-than-thou" attitude and put people off rather than draw them in? Absolutely... if it is holiness of my own works and doings rather than God working in me. God demands holiness of us, though, so, HOW?

One of the questions in the devotional asked for the definition of holiness in my own words. Would this follow in a dictionary? I don't know, but I do know that this was God's little insight into my soul for this journey.

Holiness is simply this: It is being so close with God that His character rubs off on us rather than the character of everything around us. It's that simple. It is not a super-formula I need to figure out and follow. It is not a series of actions and reactions to magically become holier. If I, in my own strength, try to be holy, then yes, I absolutely will have that "holier-than-thou" attitude and repulse people. But if it is God's work in me, that righteous and holiness will be real, and it will in turn draw people to Him and be that shining light.

Leviticus 19:2 says "Speak to the entire assembly of Israel and say to them: 'Be holy because I, the LORD your God, am holy." Holiness is a commandment from God. It is not optional. Are you up for the challenge?

Resolutions

Christmas is over, the New Year is just a couple days away, and this is the time of year that many people re-evaluate and try to make a fresh start. Time for "New Year's Resolutions." Batman and I are working on a couple, and most people have at least one. Some resolve to eat better, to lose weight, to get in shape, to live simpler, to learn how to knit and finish that washcloth you started almost a year ago, to finish that book you've been planning for - what feels like - ever. Some resolutions turn outward and might be to spend more time with your family, to help others more, to volunteer more, to be a better parent, to be a better spouse, or friend, son or daughter, brother or sister. Maybe it is to read your Bible more, or to pray more... What I have found is that most people, in their resolutions, are trying to be a better person. And when they fall short the first time, many people give up. So here are a couple things I want you to consider as the New Year approaches:

The first day of the year is, essentially, just a day. Nowhere does it say that you must eat right, or exercise, or quit smoking, or read your Bible starting ONLY on January first. Really, that isn't a law anywhere. Today is just as good a day as any. Why wait?

On January 5th or 6th, when you screw up and eat that greasy burger, or forget to pick up your Bible that morning, DON'T QUIT!! I sincerely hope no one is ruffled or offended because I said "when"... I have just been there, done that, and know enough about human nature to know that WE ALL SCREW UP AT SOME POINT. Look, if you were already perfect, you wouldn't be making a New Year's Resolution to begin with. So, WHEN you mess up, don't GIVE UP. Every single day is a fresh start. God doesn't work like that. He doesn't hang out in Heaven, looking down and say to us, "Nope, I forgave you for that only the first time you asked. You do THAT again and you are up a creek." No. Rather, He gives a clean slate again! Which is not to say that we get to keep on messing up on purpose just because we know we'll be forgiven, but there is grace. God sees the heart, and He forgives when we come to him and once again washes us clean. So, if God doesn't give up on us or deem us to be "unchangeable", why should we do that to ourselves? Each day is a new, fresh start, regardless of the burger we ate or the Bible we didn't pick up yesterday. And God is waiting with open arms for us to come running to Him and ask Him for a fresh start.

Great Start

Well, we are "two" days into our second week of school. Yes, I know it is Monday. The first day of the work/school week. Yes, I still say we have made it through our second day of our second week of school. Successfully, too, I might add. Do I have trouble counting? No, I don't. But thanks for asking....

We live life on second shift. Which means we go to bed late. Like, wee hours of the morning, late. So do the kids... Well, not TOO "wee", but midnight is late enough for a ten and almost eight year old. We all sleep in. Then we get up, have lunchsupperdinner together as a family, and ship daddy off to work. Now we have two options: Start our school day then and there, or let the kids have a social life and play with their neighbor cousins. For some reason, the kids like the social life. Can't figure it out. So, we made a deal. Our school.... night.... starts at six o'clock. On. The. Dot. Except for today when poop hit the fan and chaos seemed to reign. But that is another story for another day. :)

I told little person #1 and little person #2 that I had no problem doing school in the evenings on ONE CONDITION. No matter how silly it seemed since our school schedule is, at least for now, permanently at a 6:00 pm start time, we MUST have that day's work done BEFORE we play. It is the principle of the matter. Work before play. Good ethics. So, while today was Monday, we technically did Tuesday's work.... And let me tell you, the littles are doing GREAT. Mommy is doing great...

...And mommy is totally ready to curl up on the couch with a hot cup of coffee, a fresh chocolate chip cookie and a fluff book. My brain is done.

*CHICK FLAIL!!*

I PASSED!!! With flying colors, no less!! The state average is 83. I got a 93!!! Here it is:

Wrapping Up (Week 14)

I know, I know, it hasn't even been a full week yet... But this time I am on time. :) Besides, for any of you that actually care, I didn't want to keep you waiting.

I've lost another pound. Yay! I'm getting ready to stop keeping track and "trying". So.... pictures will be coming soon. :) Hopefully. I do have one awful "before" pic and am hoping for lots of good "after" pics this weekend. We'll see if I can remember the camera first of all, and secondly, and just as important, remember charged batteries. :) I'm waiting with barely concealed impatience to see how she did when all was said and done. Who won?? And what was the prize? Hmm.... needs to be something good. :)

Oops, better update... (Week 13)

So, I was sitting here, talking to someone special, and realized, I had forgotten to update all of you this week.... I know, I know... You've been waiting at the edge of your seats for this news, I know.... Sorry :)

So, Wednesday, when I "weighed in" I was still at 130.... Not bad, VERY well within my weight "limit" for being 5'7", but slightly frustrating since I had actually hit 128.5 from time to time, and 128 is my "goal"... Just never on a "report day". *Sigh* Plus, I might be running out of time for my competition with this one, so I figured I better get it in while I can.....

Everybody ready? *drumroll please* ...............

Since the last weigh in, I am down two and a half pounds.... YAY for me!! So, since we started our "competition", I've lost a total of 11.5 pounds.... Wonder what she has gained since then.....

Updates All Around (Week 12)

Questions have been posed about my last class/test.... I am THRILLED to no end to be done, and I feel pretty confident about the state exam. I am, however, having a difficult time remaining patient while the state processes all the exams and submits our results. I think I can I think I can... wait.

Bud's birthday party was good despite the cold temperatures and rain. All the boys had a great time playing army in the woods for the weekend, complete with VERY IMPORTANT MISSIONS. Seriously. Unfortunately, the camera was without batteries. Not smart. You'll have to take my word for it: he was adorable and the boys were nearly invisible all dressed in camo. Uncle D, you'd be so proud. Oh yeah, and daddy and daddy's best friend stayed in the woods with the boys, and froze, and didn't sleep... So they called me to get me up to come up and start breakfast.... at FIVE. In the MORNING. *sigh* I'm still trying to recoup.

Ah yes... now on to the weight issue. Yes, this week, it IS an issue..... When all was said and done, I lost NOTHING. Which, I know... I said J said "stop" and that I would not actively pursue weight loss.... So, I didn't... I didn't count one single point.... And during the first two days, I lost an additional one and a half pounds... then Bud's birthday rolled around... and a weekend long campout/picnic/cookout..... So I went up two pounds, then back down the half to where I started last Wednesday to begin with. *sigh* Back to counting points. I'm afraid if I don't, those twenty pounds I just so happily shed will easily sneak back on.... Can't have that. I think I can, I think I can.... stay on track.

He Said "Stop" (Week 11)

Sort-of.... The exact words were "I think you can stop now." I told him I will not ACTIVELY try to shed any more pounds. HOWEVER, I will continue to eat the right foods and the right portions and exercise my *little* rear and abs into shape, and if more pounds come off because of it, so be it.

This weeks results? I dropped on more pound, putting me two pounds away from my ultimate goal!! WW says 128 is the bottom "acceptable" weight for someone at 5'7". Various other places say 125, 123 and 121. Doctors vary between the 123 and 125 mark. Fear not, I am not going anorexic or anything of the sort. 128 works for me. I'm not pushing for 125. Seriously, if I could just get rid of the baby bump and keep everything else toned, I'd be thrilled. Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled with 20 lbs in 11 weeks. My goal is definitely to be a little more "in shape" and get rid of the extra belly. (Yes, mom, it can be done :) )

Back on Track! (Week 10)

Grapefruit juice and extra fiber works!! So does getting back on the elliptical. Three pounds down! From what I hear, I'm DEFINITELY kicking her butt. ;)

Repeat (Week 9)

Another slow one.... half a pound again. Hey, I am just letting her catch up, that's all... (Three down since we started).... Back to carrots, celery sticks and salads, I think......

(But, hey, sixteen pounds in nine weeks isn't TOO bad, right? Eh, doesn't SOUND great...)

My first truly slow week (Week 8)

At least it wasn't stagnant or a week where I GAINED. That would be worse. I lost half a pound this week. There, challenge buddy, that should help you catch up if you are doing a pound a week.... What are you anyway?? I'm wwwaaaaiiiiiitiiiiiiiiing......

And prizes? I don't know, maybe this is where we should here from the audience. E and I are having a contest (in case you are tuning in for the first time... or maybe I wasn't overly clear before - completely possible.) A couple weeks ago, she challenged me to see if I can LOSE as much (or more??) as she GAINS in the next (then it was 9) seven weeks before she has her baby. She figured she would be gaining another 10 pounds (approximately). And, hey, every contest needs a prize, so this is where you guys (my adoring public - *cough* *snort* *choke*) come in..... So put your thinking caps on.... We need a good one!!!! (This means stop hiding and put in your two cents!! C'mon, I'm actually ASKING for it now...)

Got It!! (Week 7)

I did it!!!! I've reached the 10% goal!! This means I've lost a total of 15 pounds in the last seven weeks. Some weeks were good, some were slow, but it has been continuously downhill. :) (Not many situations where that is good, huh?) This week I lost two.

So, challenge partner, what have you GAINED this week?

P.S. The ticker is changed... if you missed the first one, too bad, so sad......

Almost There!!! (Week Six)

I lost TWO POUNDS this week!!! That leaves me with two more pounds to go for my initial 10% goal. (If you want to see how cool THAT looks on a ticker, you'll have to head to the bottom of the page - quick! before I post the next goal!!)

Oh, the next goal? I'd like to get rid of five more at the least, seven more at the most. So, if I am looking at seven, I have a total of nine pounds left to lose. Woo hoo!!!! This could be doable in time for summer!!